Wonderful Merciful Savior

I Am Free!

As a child I loved the stars and would spend hours looking up into the night sky.  Somehow in the scariness of the dark there was peace in the vastness of the constellations.  Some comfort that chance couldn’t create something as amazing as this.

I grew up in a loving home with everything I could have ever wanted and a Dad that could protect me from anything.  But still I was afraid.  By five I was afraid of everything.  There were men that had hurt me and even my Dad couldn’t protect me.  When I was thirteen I was hurt again and so began my life of fear.  Fear that I couldn’t be loved, that everyone could see my scars, and that I was marked by the pain that haunted me.

By the time I left for college I was like wounded animal running from death.  My fear soon led me to false hopes, anger, depression, adultery and divorce.  Everything about my life was pure chaos.  Anything that used to be secure crumbled.  I no longer looked at the sky.  I was afraid that it would come down on me too.  I spent my entire life trying to please people and be loved, and now who could love me?

One of Satan’s greatest weapons is to have us doubt that salvation exists.  He takes great victory when he keeps us running in a direction away from God.  And that is what I always did.  I am a great runner.  When it comes to problems and uncomfortable situations for me, I will run away.  As soon as I was able to understand and fully accept the salvation that Jesus has given to us, I started running to Him.  What joy there is, to be able to run into the arms of a loving savior!

It was a slow process for me because I had to learn to trust.  I still struggle with the spirit of fear, but I have learned that Jesus Christ is faithful.  I have found courage, peace and strength through my relationship with him.  I have complete control over my life and I am no longer a slave to sin.  Even though many of my worst fears have come true, I no longer have the weight of my past slowing me down.  I have given it all to Him.  I am free.

Advertisements

6 Comments

  1. You are free indeed!!
    Everytime I read your blog title the song plays in my head – how wonderful to have a title that brings music to a person’s mind!!!

    Beautiful,wonderful Savior

    “You are the One that we praise
    You are the One we adore
    You give the healing and grace
    Our hearts always hunger for
    Oh, our hearts always hunger for”

    “Almighty, infinite Father
    Faithfully loving Your own
    Here in our weakness You find us
    Falling before Your throne
    Oh, we’re falling before Your throne”

  2. Wonderful Merciful Savior

    “Counselor, Comforter, Keeper
    Spirit we long to embrace
    You offer hope when our hearts have
    Hopelessly lost the way
    Oh, we hopelessly lost the way”

    I know it is my favorite song!!

  3. For a great many years I was held in bondage to the spirit of fear…of the present, past and future. I loved quoting one of my favourite scriptures…”God is not the author of fear, but of love, peace and a sound mind”. It helped me to do this whenever I felt fear crowding in…Diane

    • Wonderful Merciful Savior

      Thank you for all of your great insights!! I will mark that one and keep it close at all times. It is so wonderful to have you commenting on my posts. I am a pretty young christian (6 years) and I feel like I am just beginning to learn all of the wonders in God’s word. I am always looking for mentors to help me on my journey. Keep the comments coming, I love them!!!

  4. I am so distressed by Christians who doubt their salvation. Even some of our churches teach us to doubt our salvation, but Jesus died to free us from sin, and promise us heaven.
    I am so glad to know that you do not doubt, that you know you are saved!

    • Wonderful Merciful Savior

      There are churches that teach us to doubt our salvation? That is so sad…..salvation is such an important part of the gospel. I love Jesus and I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that I am saved! Praise be to God!!!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: